Persevering in smelly projects

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I always thought that I was a good, if not great, project person. I have been quite proud that I always delivered customer projects in time, budget and quality. At the same time, I am quite good at slacking off from time to time and to get the rest and relaxation I need. And what can be better than having the freedom to lay a project aside for a couple of hours, or days, knowing that it will be ready on schedule?

Last night however, I got to know my limitations. I learned that there are projects that cannot be laid aside and I was first shocked, then amazed, that sometimes procrastination is not only undesirable but simply impossible.

Last night at about 3 am, my 13-day old son prompted me, with a cunning combination of scream and smell, to pick him up and change his diapers. Seconds later, I found myself standing at the dressing table, barely awake, barely asleep, with an adorable and rewarding, yet utterly smelly and screaming child an arm’s length away.

Can you remember a time during a project when you just wanted to slack off? To have a latte in your favorite coffee shop? To drive to the beach? Just leave the thing alone, sit back and relax? Procrastination can be sooo sweet sometimes, eh?

“Slacking off is for the mind and soul. It may not be a lot of people’s cup of tea, but it’s mine.” everything2.com

So as I stood there at 3 am, doing my best to console this beautiful thing with his flailing arms, I realized that this was a kind of, uhm, project that just cannot be laid aside. I couldn’t just say “Oh well, let’s finish this design spec tomorrow and have a coffee now. It needs some incubation anyway.” I could not just slack off and have a coffee. This task had to be dealt with now, and it had to be completely finished on schedule.

(Carrying the project management metaphor further, I could have escalated the issue to my wife, but the project was at a stage where adding more resources wouldn’t have helped.)

To be honest, this was a shock and awe situation for me: For the first time in my life, I was faced with something that had to be done, now. There was no back door, nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, and I was staggered. So I took a deep breath of fresh, warm air through the half-open window, looked at my little project and decided to hang on.

To my surprise, it was easier than I had thought. I knew what I was doing (having learnt the tools of the diaper-changing trade years before with my cousins), and the inevitable decision to hang on actually made the process – pun intended - much smoother.

The bottom line: Whenever you are faced with a – maybe already smelly – project that’s bugging you and flailing its arms, holding on to it may not be the most pleasant thing to do (especially when the coffee shop is just around the corner). But if it helps to get the job done, and if delegation is not possible, and if all other options would lead, predictably, to a failed project, an unhappy customer and a low paycheck, just hang in there and do it.

(And don’t you say this is a commonplace until you’ve been standing with me and my small, smelly, beautiful and adorable “project” at the dressing table at 3 am!)

The No. 1 Motivation

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Last week, our wonderful son was born, and we are full of joy. (Thanks to all of you for your congratulations, good wishes and presents!)

Talking of which—Is there a better motivation to implement Tim Ferriss’ “Four Hour Workweek” than knowing that each hour spending with your beloved ones matters so much more than spending it in the daily rat race?

What a Difference a Smile Makes

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Two months ago, one of my customers invited me to a very upscale steakhouse in Frankfurt, Germany, to celebrate the completion of a project. The menu contained numerous errors and was more like an insult to my eyes. The so–called mousse au chocolat tasted like pure butter with a minute hint of artificial cocoa aroma. Waiters excelled in waiting for us to order while standing impatiently behind us. Flashy bloat everywhere, with very little relevant content.

Yesterday, a couple of friends and I visited a simple, small café in the Portuguese district of Hamburg, Germany. Old chairs, a glaringly loud TV in one corner of the small guest room, all slightly filthy. We ordered some galaos and drank them. When we got ready to leave and said “Thank you” to the young waiter, he smiled, replying “Oh, that’s okay. It’s my job here to make you happy.”

I could’ve had more than 160 galaos at this wonderful place with my customer for the money he had spent at the luxuriously disappointing steakhouse. If you ever come to Hamburg, be sure to visit the Café Praia de Vagueira in No. 10, Ditmar-Koel-Straße, Hamburg.

We’re on a Mission from Bloat … not!

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I am a big fan of short, sweet company “mantras” as suggested by Guy Kawasaki and frequently work with my clients in such a way that they know their mantra before they set out on any marketing mission.

This being said, whenever I stumble upon an old-school “mission statement”, I usually recoil in mild disgust, being reminded of the dotcom bloat in the nineties and the suits filled with no more than evenly bloated mission statements.

Recently, however, I found a company with a most charming mission statement (and a most charming owner) …

ConnectingDotz develops products that link people with ideas with people with ideas … We do this by highlighting words, images and values that unite us across boundaries of all kinds.

I know that if I hadn’t known the owner of the company before I had found the web site, I’d have clicked away quickly, and I know a great deal of people who’d have done exactly the same. It does sound cheesy, doesn’t it?

Yes. And no. Yes, because its form corresponds to many other filled-with-hot-air mission statements. No because its content is true to what they really do. Just because a mission statement sounds cheesy, by no means is it cheesy. And even though it could be replaced by a shorter, Kawasaki-style mantra, I’d rather leave it as it is.

Oh, here’s the site: www.connectingdotz.com (Nice christmas gifts, by the way!)

What Makes a Truly Great Customer?

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What makes a truly great customer? No, not that he pays your bills in time, or that he recommends your services to prospects.

If you are a web developer, you know what it’s like to spend hours on hours cursing and battling the dreaded MSIE to make it display your customer’s website correctly. A truly great customer doesn’t just e-mail you a thank you note if you succeed.

No, the mark of a Truly Great Customer is that she mails you a custom-printed t-shirt.

Thanks, Petra!

The 20th Hole at Five p.m.

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It’s done! After weeks of painstaking research and many writing sessions (not to mention all those grande cappuccinos) at my local Starbucks, the first episode of the first ever mental golf coaching podcast went live today. It is available for subscription at the iTunes Music Store.

Read the press release here: Bridging the Mental Barrier to Success in Golf. Free audiobook reveals the secrets to the perfect game.

This project is just one example of what is possible when a cleanly defined niche market is addressed with targeted online marketing. What is online now is just the beginning of a funnel marketing approach, so stay tuned and watch out for what’s to come!

Teaching Intuition in Sport

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Recently, Jennifer Kahn of Wired Magazine posted a great article on mental sports coaching: Wayne Gretzky-Style ‘Field Sense’ May Be Teachable

“In any sport, you come across these players,” Vint says. “They’re not always the most physically talented, but they’re by far the best. The way they see things that nobody else sees — it can seem almost supernatural. But I’m a scientist, so I want to know how the magic works.”

While much of the article is not much news to seasoned mental sport coaches, it is an interesting read for those new to the field and for potential clients as a showcase of possibilities.

The Top Five Market Niches for Vagabonding Life Coaches

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With so many people talking about Timothy Ferriss’ book, The 4-Hour Workweek (aff), I discovered that this book was exactly the right thing to enter my life at the exactly right time. I’ve been thinking about leading a more mobile life for about half a year, but with this book I gained massive momentum and increased my actions to actually do most of what Tim is writing about.

As I’m doing marketing consulting for coaches, I’ve been asking myself: How can someone who does life coaching (or personal coaching or whatever you might call it) combine his profession with an ultra-mobile lifestyle? So here’s my 0.02 euros on the Top Five Market Niches for Vagabonding Life Coaches

No. 5: Specialize in internationally universal issues

This is not as easy as it might sound. Unbelievable as it is for my stereotypically angst-ridden fellow German countrymen, there are countries or cultures where issues such as depression are nearly unheard of. But how about, for example, the catch-all of life coaches, “work-life balance”? In any given country that suffers from a 9-to-5-culture there are thousands of potential clients just waiting for an “expert from Germany” (or the U.S., or Japan, etc.) to arrive and assist them in escaping the rat race, especially when this expert (you!) has already collected experience about this universal issue in other countries.

No. 4: Specialize in issues specific to countries or cultures

If you’re planning to spend a couple of months in another country find out about culture specific issues that you can address with personal coaching or seminars. If you’re into crisis intervention, read the news about current events that might make people scared or frightened, and offer coaching specific to these events.

Keep in mind that while it is beneficial to speak the language of your destination country, it is not as important as you might think. Instead, invest your time learning the manners of your destination country. I once coached a gentleman from Saudi Arabia using only very basic English, and it worked out great. You can also hire a professional translator for your sessions or let your client bring one of his multilingual friends. This works even in intimate personal coaching and therapeutic contexts. Don’t underestimate the increased expert status you’ll have as “foreign expert!”

No. 3: Specialize in Sports Coaching

Mental sports coaching is a huge field. I’ve been doing Mental Golf coaching for a couple of years now, but there are dozens of other sports that benefit greatly from mental coaching. Just imagine: How much does the mental state of, say, a baseball pitcher, influence the quality of his throws? How about complementing Indian cricketers’ indigenous meditation methods with some left-hemispheric mental strategy coaching á la NLP? Or working with the coach of a soccer team and introducing modern hypnosis in the pre-game process? The possibilities are endless.

No. 2: Specialize in Coaching for Musicians

Often called an “international language,” music is very closely tied to a country and its culture(s). However, the issues musicians and vocalists are faced with are universal: Stage fright before performances is omnipresent, even with well-known (and well-paid) professionals. This is true especially in the field of classical performances, but I’ve also worked with jazz pianists who wanted to “get into the flow” faster. If you successfully specialize in mental coaching for musicians, you’ll never run out of clients and all-access backstage passes.

No. 1: The Power of Self-Referential Coaching and Training

Probably the easiest and most rewarding issue to specialize if you’re inclined to be a vagabonding coach or trainer: Teach others to do what you’re doing right now. Coach them to escape 9-to-5, coach them to build their own businesses, hold seminars on lifestyle design, and so on. If you’re travelling the world and want to coach or train people, teach others how to travel the world and coach and train people. Heck, you might even want to teach others how to teach others how to train. (Which is, incidentally, what I do most of the time.) Whatever self-referential topic you choose: You can be sure that it automatically comes with the added bonus of authenticity.

Go on and choose your preferred niche, or e-mail me with more suggestions. Now please excuse me, I’m off to Fiji finding new business opportunities …

Plugging the Obvious

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While I’m still writing and refining my upcoming article “Selling Snake Oil to Skeptics,” allow me a quick plug for my latest venture: HeadProCoaching Golf Mental Performance Coaching.

If you’re inclined, have a look at www.headprocoaching.com (available in English, German, Japanese and Spanish) and count the niches. We are addressing a very narrow segment (golfers with hcp ≤ 12) of a market that is narrow in itself: ambitious amateur golfers rather than people who play “just” for fun.

The golfing community is full of niches, and this is just one of them. It’s all about finding out about the needs a very small and very specific segment of a market, and satisfy them.

Coaching and Therapy Made Simple: Three Steps

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As announced, I’ve condensed the results of my recent seminar on effective coaching and therapy into this post.

Many people have been writing or talking about the merits of maximal simplicity in various contexts; recent examples include John Maeda’s book and blog, or David Pogue’s presentation at TED 2006 focusing on simplicity in software.

It seems that in many contexts, simplicity is the basis for complexity, so why make coaching more complex than it is?

Take another example: During my AI studies, we equipped simulated ants with some simple, local rules. Then we watched our ant colonies evolve very complex behaviour patterns such as ant trails or elaborate attack/retreat patterns. It took only very few simple, local rules to effect large-scale, systemic change. Dee Hock carries this notion to extremes:

Simple, clear purpose and principles give rise to complex and intelligent behavior. Complex rules and regulations give rise to simple and stupid behavior.
(Dee Hock, quoted in Getting Things Done by David Allen)

My goal is to make coaching and therapy more effective by reducing rules and radically simplifying methodologies. So here is my first, probably still drafty, attempt at a listing of all things necessary to be a great coach:

Step One: Prerequisites

  1. Know Your Role And Responsibilites. Be aware of the role(s) you take on as coach or therapist. Are you a “helper,” a “supporter” or even a “saviour”? Learn to adapt your role to what serves yourself and your client best. Also, be aware that the client’s goals are not your responsibility but entirely his own. Your resposibility as coach or therapist is to do the best you can to support your client strengthening his responsibility for himself. The best way to achieve this is by taking responsibility for yourself. Once you get this right, you are out of the exhausting my-client-isn’t-changing-that-means-that-I-have-done-it-WRONG! issue that plagues many newcomers to the field.

  2. Be Flexible. It helps to be able to adapt to the client’s point of view. It helps to have a radical constructivist approach. (Further reading: Paul Watzlawick, Richard Bandler, Ernst von Glasersfeld et al.).

  3. Optimize yourself. Be aware of yourself and strive to resolve your emotional issues that arise before, during or after working with a client. You are doing yourself and your clients a big favor by staying alert, awake and mentally healthy.

Step Two: A Basic Process

This basic coaching process, cited by many authors, is all you need, even for large-scale systemic changework. Don’t be fooled by its simplicity; instead, be inspired.

  1. Find A Compelling Goal. This might range from simple issues such as “be relaxed in front of large audiences” to “knowing what my life is all about”. Use Steve de Shazer’s “Miracle Question” and/or NLP’s “SMART” process to find, formulate and fortify (alliteration not intended) a goal.

  2. Test Whether You Have Reached Your Goal. As soon as the goal is found, support your client in staying focused and continually evaluate whether the current behaviors, emotions, belief sets etc. actually support reaching the goal. If not, intervene by using one of the tools mentioned below.

  3. Continue until the goal is reached. As simple as that. Of course, the goal can be re-formulated during the process—Actually, in most cases it must be re-formulated because the systemic changes that happen during a coaching/therapy process can not be predicted when you’re defining the goal for the first time.

Step Three: Tools

Prerequisites and process are not enough. You need some basic tools to support your client to actually make the changes he desires.

  1. Sort. It helps to know how to support a client in sorting his or her issues. Most clients enter your practise with little or no knowledge about the various aspects that make up their issue. Use Robert Dilts’ “Logical Levels” model to quickly scan through various aspects of an issue. (Yes, I know, the LL are neither logical nor are they levels. However, it is a vastly useful framework, and usefulness is all that counts.)

  2. Listen And Talk. Be able to talk to your client and understand what he means be asking process-oriented questions. The “meta model” used in NLP, Robert Dilts’ “Sleight of Mouth” patterns and the type of circular questioning used by some systemic schools works wonders.

  3. Decouple. You need at least one reliable method to decouple emotional reactions from external or internal stimuli. Cognitive behavior therapy helps a lot, even ultra-simplistic CBT tools like EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques® by Gary Craig) can clear out severe emotional distress in minutes.

I am quite sure that there is nothing more to add to become a great coach or therapist when you heed those recommendations. I invite you to prove me wrong, though! As always, this is work in process, so comments are welcome.